And paraphrasing one of our friends, its without doubt been some of the slowest days (and nights) of our life, but perplexingly the fastest six months we've ever known. Bing bang... there it goes. At this rate we'll be waking up tomorrow morning and the kid will be tip toeing in the front door from an all nighter at the pub.
Still theres one thing about being a parent of an infant that we've decided no one tells you.
Tiredness.
Not just a bit pooped, but constantly feeling that little bit sleep deprived and a tad dazed and confused. Even when you get a good nights sleep you wake up wondering why you're buggered.
Dad, of course, has his biological theories:
- its natures version of Guantanamo Bay; deprive the non-combatant of sleep for long enough and they'll bend to your every will - like changing endless crappy nappies, getting wee'd on at regular intervals and being spewed over with regurgitated milk product; all with a smile and love.
- it prevents either parent from extra marital affairs. Any invitation to "come sleep with me sexy" will be taken literally. They will just sleep.
Speaking of crappy nappies, and the story that is mum's incredible shedding hair (a natural artifact of hormones that gave her more hair during pregnancy now cutting out, and said luxurious growth now shedding) and subsequent birdsnest of hair that is now the house... The boy did a poo containing hair. Mums hair. Its both gross and amazing all at the same time. (But mostly gross.)
As for the boy himself, he's now well and truly teething. And not just from the tooth on the bottom, but a newy thats now spurting down from the top and really giving him the yips. Hence out has had to come the baby panadol and the creamy stuff that you rub on his gums. Poor lil tike.
Made even poorer when he bit on mums boozies mid feed and she screamed louder than he ever could (and thats some scream). Freaked the boy out. Not to mention mum.
But even with a case of the whinges and mucky looking gums, the lads still the stud muffin he was way back when he was in horse-piddle six months ago. Taken to visit Jenni-from-(round)the-block, he met Beth, Jen's 18month old. Beth was instantly hooked on the masters charms, and kept stroking M's hair and generally giving the lad a bit of a touch up. Of course it all ended in tears; unfortunately hers when Mike left.
You lil heartbreaker you Mike.
PS. The wobbly dog goes all youtube - see below.
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